What would you tell your younger self about sex

Have you ever wished you could sit down with your younger self and have a little heart-to-heart?

Maybe you’d tell her to walk away from that toxic relationship sooner. To stop saying no to opportunities because she didn’t think she was “good enough.” Or maybe you’d remind her to slow down and soak up more of those moments with the people she loved.

I think most of us could make a pretty long list of things we would do differently if we had the chance.

But here’s the thing: we can’t go back and change the past.

What we can do is look back with a little more compassion, a little more wisdom, and maybe even a little humor.

And sometimes, the best way to do that is to write a letter to the younger version of ourselves.

A letter filled with the things we wish she had known, the things we’ve learned along the way, and maybe a few reminders that she was doing better than she thought she was.

I can across "Letters to My Younger Self" when researching ways to help some of my clients. 

Some are faced with not believing in their worth of pleasure, some don't understand what's going on with their bodies, yet some are struggling to keep the intimacy with their partners.

What I discovered is something that even celebrities have even practiced. A way to to hear, get and see advise from your younger self. We all know that sometimes when another is trying to help you their advice falls upon closed ears. Yet there's something to be said about getting advice from your younger self. That is exactly what I found when I came  across blogs with thoughtful letters people had written to themselves as well as a book "Letters to My Younger Self"

When you read letters written to your younger self you can realize you would be proud of who you had become and the wisdom you had gained. A younger you would have pretended to be okay and shove down the problem, sadness or doubts down, however the older version of you was unafraid to admit you were struggling and see support.

So why would you write these letters and the possible value of doing so:

• They can help acknowledge our past, explore our experiences and reflect on how these have shaped us.
• They offer the opportunity to catalog milestones, celebrate small and big successes
• It's a powerful activity for building self-esteem and self-love while practicing gratitude
• They hold space for negative thoughts and feelings while simultaneously opening up possibilities to reframe them or move past them
• It's a chance to engage in self-care and speak to ourselves with empathy and kindness

Personal letter writing also provides a platform to share these reflections with others, if we so choose. We can learn together and even find unity across experiences.  I can honestly say that when I read some of the celebrities notes to their younger selves it made me stop and think "What would I tell me younger self?" 

Letters from yourself

Ready to write your own? Try using one of the suggestions below to get started. This is a totally judgement-free practice, so my suggestion would be to write without concern for making your letter sound or look a certain way.  Remember, there's no one way to write a letter to yourself, put down whatever you'd like to include or not.

Reflect

Think about an age or time in your life that you'd like to write about. Begin by addressing this version of your younger self.

Questions you could consider when writing:

• What would the younger you think of you today?
• What advice or insights would you offer your younger self?
• What might you need to hear given your past experiences?

Acknowledge

Try to name any emotions that come up when writing about your experiences and give yourself time to acknowledge them. How are you feeling in relation to your younger self and past experiences? Is there something you'd like to move past or let go of? Mayhap consider shifting your perception of yourself to give space for forgiveness and healing.

Speak with Kindness

Throughout your entire letter, be kind and gentle with yourself. There could be things you wish were different, but it's important not to remain stuck on circumstances we can't change. Instead, remind yourself you're worthy of respect and compassion, regardless of the past. Note what you appreciate about yourself and the qualities you admire. When we speak kindly to ourselves, we move away from negative thinking patterns to embrace the opportunity to learn self-love.

My Thoughts

I've learned much about myself while researching this for you all. Taking the time to self reflect, acknowledge the challenges I've overcome being in business for over 11 years, changes in my family dynamics and the changes to my own body. Take if from personal experience this can bring up some very powerful emotions. You might consider discussing with a therapist first before attempting it on your own.

Thank you ALL for your continued support, understanding and eagerness to learn more.

PassionatelyMel